I want to talk to the ladies about where our priorities are in life? I have to say that from my personal experience, I was busy CHASING A MAN AND NOT MY DREAMS! I know that sound crazy but I had this idea that I would support my future husband and his dreams and I never thought that I should be busy CHASING MY OWN DREAMS! I feel like I was busy wanting to be the TRADITIONAL WIFE and just be home cooking, cleaning and taking care of the kids. Trust me, being a stay at home mom is a full time job!
I don’t think there is nothing wrong with being the traditional wife because my parents live that traditional life. I grew up seeing my dad work and my mom home cooking and cleaning. When I met my husband I was sure I would be a great house wife. I always had a LOVE OF WRITING but was too afraid to pursue it. So did everything under the sun except writing. But in the back of my head I decide that I would rather just work hard taking care of the household. I worked here and there but my husband was the bread winner. Well my husband passed away so now I WAS LOST! NOW I have to figure out what I wanted to do?
So I decided to find someone who I can love again and marry so that I can really get back to being a housewife. Well in between chasing a man down and having no luck, I decided that I need to stop worrying about being someone wife and FOCUS ON WHAT I WANTED TO DO IN LIFE!!! Then God gave me the revelation to START WRITING! But I did not know what I wanted to write about. I used to write poetry but I wanted to try writing a non fiction book. But in writing my first book, GOD GAVE ME THE ULTIMATE PLAN!
God told me to write about ME! I was like NO! Lord I am afraid of doing that! I did not want to expose my faults and mistakes to the world. But God said since you want to be a wife, why not START A BLOG ABOUT YOUR JOUREY OF TRYING TO BE A WIFE! I thought I was going crazy because I used to be a wife but now a widow. But God wanted me to talk about my journey of trying to find a husband but never becoming a wife. To share my journey of not loving myself and hiding behind my dreams by being a housewife and not pursuing my dreams. I LOVE LOVE but I never found the love that I wanted because I DID NOT LOVE MYSELF! I put myself through a lot of heart break and pain. Through that I got tired of chasing love when I OBVIOUSLY DID NOT LOVE MYSELF! It was time for me to WORK ON MYSELF and work on being the best woman single and then I can ONE DAY BE A FUTURE WIFE! God just gave me my title for my BLOG!
So now that I got my title I had to actually PURUSE MY DREAMS!! That was scary for me because I never fully pursed my true dream before! I chased what I thought would make me money or I chased wanting a husband, but not anything that I wanted to do! So I am telling the world my business lol. Telling you guys my struggle with self love and telling you that I have been a mistress and have my youngest by a married man! That I had my first daughter from a one night stand! Why am I telling you this? God want me to tell you that Put your trust in HIM AND LOVE YOURSELF! Inspire women to SELF LOVE!
I have a long way to go but I am proud of myself for getting MY LIFE BACK ON TRACK! I am starting off with my notebook and my laptop but this is only the beginning. I am proud to say I am BACK WITH GOD, NOW CELIBATE, LOVING MYSELF AND NOW PURSUING MY DREAMS!!! I will be blessed with a husband and have the family I desire but when my season come. We all have a season of being single and a season of finding love. I am in my journey of loving myself and God! So I no longer CHASING A MAN BUT I CHASING GOD AND MY DREAMS!!!