The number one thing I realized with love is, Don’t Love when you are lonely. When you are lonely, it make you almost desperate for love. We tend to put up with actions that is not worthy of love. There is no love for yourself, but more of the idea of love.
Love is really hard work. I watched Wendy Williams and she had Whoopi Goldberg on her show. Whoopi has a new book called IF YOU COMPLETE ME, RUN. Whoopi talked about running from anyone who say you complete them! I knew that is one of the problems I found out about myself. I looked for a man to complete me. I did not think I was complete unless I was in a relationship. I depended on someone to make me happy, to make me feel beautiful and to complete me! The sad part of it is men knew that I was desperate for love. There are some people that will take advantage of your need of love and affection. They know you will accept certain things because they know we will do anything to feel like we are special to someone. We want to be able to tell someone we are taken and someone do think we are a good catch.
What Whoopi Goldberg said resonated with me. We have to be able to be complete within ourselves before we link up with someone special. Do you love yourself? Are we happy with our lives? Do we really have the time to devote to someone? Are we really ready to love? Make sure you are asking these questions before you think about dating. When you don’t take time to heal yourself you end up looking for others to do the job for you.
Fact is no one is willing to stay with you when you are broken. That person will try to stick around and help you but ultimately you have to be a service to yourself. YOU have to be the one to fix what is broken within yourself. DON’T depend on others to love you and they don’t have to accept you while you are broken. They will be around when they see you doing the work, but if you are doing things that jeopardize the relationship and yourself, then that person will have no choice but to leave so that they can let you focus on loving yourself. When you take care of your inner and spiritual self is when you are open and ready to love someone and have someone love you in return.
Focus on YOU while you are single. Focus on what’s important to you. Do not love when you see others loving someone. We look at couples and assume they are cute and really in love. We get to wishing we had someone special. Now we are on a frantic search to find a love like theirs. We end up dating people who don’t really like us. Forget love, people feed off the energy you give. So when you are desperate, they will sense that and do things that disrespect you and the relationship because they know you will be back! So just make sure we are exuding self love and have happiness dripping through our pores. The best time to Love is when we are READY and not when we are Lonely!