As a Christian woman who is being reserved until God send his best, I often wonder about dating. I am not dating anyone at this minute but if I meet the right person, how would we approach sex? Let’s be realistic. Just because you made the vow to wait till marriage does not mean we won’t think about it. When you meet someone and the chemistry is there, how do you restrain from getting intimate?
I want to stay celibate and save myself for the right man. I speak for myself and say that when you feel that chemistry with someone, you want to get closer. thoughts about being intimate with this person will become more real. So I want to make sure that I am not giving in to temptation! I know It’s easier said when you are not currently dating lol.
In order for me not to give in to temptation or even convincing this person that it’s ok to do it just one time, I have to guard my body and thoughts. I know I am not the only one would try to tell my Christian man that its ok to give in just this one time lol. When a man say he want to wait till he get married before he make love with you, that is a turn on! That will make us want him even more! That’s real. But we cannot be ruled by the flesh but the word of God.
STEP 1: Make sure both of you have the same morals and goals in life. It will not work if two people are not celibate. If you are celibate and he or she is not, then one of you will not be strong enough to remain celibate. Its easier to be equally yoked!
STEP 2:I have decided is no house dates!!! If you know you are not strong enough to hang out and “watch Nexflix” you should not make any dates for a romantic dinner at the house. I would consider house dates if its for a family gathering and I am spending time with his family or him spending time with mines. Safe and easy way to have a house date.
STEP 3: Stay away from sexual conversations or talking body parts. Being celibate is not always easy, so the innocent joke about the body part looking like some type of fruit will not work. It always start off innocent and then it could lead to something more graphic and then you will want to meet them in the bedroom. Even now, if a guy talk to me and make an innocent sex joke, I shut it down! It is even a turn off for me. We all have had sex at one point, so nothing is taboo. Im not curious about how good you are in bed. I’m more curious about you walk with God, your family, goals and dreams. So I need more and its not coming from the bedroom lol.
STEP 4: is make sure we both pray daily, Pray to resist temptation and have our scriptures to support us abstaining from sex till marriage. I think that can be tough because most want to see if they are even sexually compatible with their mates. The question is what If this person cannot fulfill my desires? Well I strongly believe that whoever God put you with will fulfill your needs spiritually as well as physically. Nothing missing and nothing broken. God know who to put us with. Don’t doubt the match maker.
For now, that’s all I can do to resist temptation. To say that temptation will not happen is not realistic . The best thing to do is be open and honest with yourself. That is the best way to tackle any situation, good or bad. If you know some other ways to restrain from becoming intimate while dating, feel free to leave a comment at the end!